When we are wanting to call true love in, we often get caught up in our intentions, vision boards, the twin flames and “the meant to be.”

I believe that while we co-create reality there are many parts of us going the dance , including our shadow. SO what we call to ourselves isn’t always what it seems. It’s really an amazing lesson wrapped up in a lovely or not so lovely experience.

I have alot of experience in this. My first boyfriends ( yes more than one) were at 4-5 years old. I started dating at 15. One thing I have experienced over and over in my life in relationship is BEING LOVED, ADORED and VALUED. So when the opposite shows up, it can’t live in my world for too long. It’s unacceptable. My inner Aphrodite literally rises up and shakes me up. The Love Goddess within doesn’t stand for inauthentic exchanges and that’s a good thing!

I have also experienced LOVING deeply and completely on all levels. Many soulmate relationships. Proposed to 7x with ring before age of 32. I wasn’t ready in the beginning. I wanted to be unfettered and “know myself.” I embraced my Soul communication at a young age and I was struggling since my 20s to find a way to master and own my Soul work.

Later I was also engaged and was a step-mom to three kids. I was able to leave all these relationships with love and peace in my heart. I was convinced that the Universe was guiding me and that there was a reason these relationships weren’t forever. At this time as my business finally is in a place that allows me to feel I can step out there again, I am ready.

There are a few things that I have gathered along the way…

* Remember that we are under no obligation to be married or with children at any age. Times have changed. Pressures may remain but we can truly create our lives more than ever before. This means that YOU or HE/SHE won’t settle as quickly as people may have in the past.

* This freedom ROCKS and SUCKS. The rules of the past enacted a mating ritual that needed in marriage whether it was fulfilling or not because fit worked ie. power/status/resources/children. The new rituals that we are creating leaves us free-floating and gaining awareness as we go along.

* FB, Tinder & dating sites make NEW people available all the time. It’s fun , maybe but gets old. If someone is passing you up, they weren’t your man/woman to begin with.

* Take time to see who is who. We all look shiny & fab. It’s a matter of time when we are runny-nosed and bleary-eyed. Love the real being human and SPirit not the amazing mate they are on paper or website.

* Just because it feels so good when you are together…doesn’t mean it’s meant to be. The moment and exchange might be meant to be. Anything beyond that is an assumption.

* Just because you looked in their eyes or they looked in yours and said, ” you are so special” doesn’t mean you are getting married. It doesn’t mean that you aren’t either.

* Just because you feel and it’s the love of your life, doesn’t mean that they are… “WAITING” for them to grow up and realize UMMM it just won’t do. YOU deserve MORE. I’ve been stalked, it’s not fun. If it was meant to be, I would’ve said yes. I’ve waited for someone to heal, he never did. Take your time AND face the truth.

* Soul stirring, mind-blowing, body ablazing sex…can sometimes be just that. God bless it anyway 

* Sometimes people come in to your life, sweep you off your feet and then leave. They weren’t ready. They weren’t the One but they definitely showed you something?

I think ASSUMPTIONS are what hurt us the most. It’s not a monogamous relationship till you’ve both agreed. It’s not polyamorous till everyone has agreed. You are not moving in till you do. The power is in the moment and as we build a foundation with someone, it’s good to check into our assumptions.

Where did you have a better experience? Were they a messenger of something more aligned to come? Did they reflect a shadow or fear to you ?
Did they show you how GREAT it can be, just not forever with them?

We are all in the end, soul mates. Made from the same stuff, dancing our mirrored souls to each other. Sometimes it’s not pretty but it’s always worth it.

So keep holding the FEELINGS that you want to feel and allow the person to enter your life. Keep your heart open  I am with you in this experiment and excited for what is unfolding. Mmmm delicious love.

Love is all, V