PERFECT TIMING: Many of us sensitives may be extremely harsh and critical with ourselves. I know I was. I felt ashamed for many years…why? you may wonder? I felt that I had a tremendous ability to see, hear, feel and know intuitive information and what was I doing with it? I projected a pressure from the Universe, my guides and Soul~ that I was not doing ENOUGH with what I had. I felt guilty, here I was very talented in many ways and yet, what did I have to show for it? I served wherever I was. Like the ancient version of priestess, I worked devotedly behind the scenes.
I trained. I had a spiritual practice and a discipline and I gave away my services.
In time, I began to charge. I held classes. I rented space. I felt, “it’s not time yet. I’m not ready. I need more training. I don’t have enough live mentors supporting my work. I don’t know where to begin. I work too much, where will I find the time?”
My full-time business didn’t happen perfectly. In fact, it’s a miracle it ever happened at all.
I worked a corporate job, did a mastermind and worked nights and weekends. Right before a major surgery, I was laid off from said corporate job. Like the day before. A deep romantic relationship ended after surgery. My business was on hold. Car accident and MRSA that was overlooked months before by my doctors. Five months of almost no business. Painful beyond belief. I didn’t feel well and I was using up all my savings for medical expenses. Enough to make anyone ask,” Universe, have you forsaken me?”
Enough to make anyone give up.
Enough to make you run back to the safety of the cubicle until I could get myself together again.
My Soul charged me to step up and IN. It was my time.
Yes, sensitives. We want the light to be JUST SO, so we can write.
The moon to be in deep fullness and the One to be gallant and perfect so we may fall in love.
We want the right amount of money in the bank to make the leap into our dreams. Our bodies to be just so, our homes to be in perfect harmony so our lives can be what we DREAMED of.
What IF The lack of external harmony and peace is there just to teach you to create the harmony and peace you want within?
As human beings, our brains want us to cross of numbers, lists and circle to-do’s ( i love lists btw!) but our Souls whisper,” you have everything that you need. NOW.”
What did I have? No man. No financial support. An exhausted, healing body and weary heart. Business at a standstill…
Then unemployment made a mistake and ended prematurely. Yes. Truth.
I will tell you what I did have:
1. The faith that I was supported by a loving God/Goddess/Great Spirit/Universe.
2. The deep understanding that this was set up to bring the best out of me.
3. The awareness, that NOTHING is stable. All is change. Only our inner being in it’s PRESENCE and being PRESENT is the stabilizing influence.
4. Family, friends, clients and students who loved me dearly.
5. A mind, body and spirit that has often gone through hell and back and not only survived but THRIVED.
5. Proof of all of the above. I had experienced miracles from choosing the 11th doctor to operate me and saving what was deemed unsalvageable to emerging from a double rollover and landing upside down car accident UNSCATHED. All the miracles happened because I LISTENED TO MY INTUITION.
I even faced my shadow, my pride in my independence. I asked for help from two friends that had promised years ago, that they would step up if I ever needed them. I have always been very proud for doing things on my own…I never asked before. I hated asking. I knew I had to grow past these shadows that meant if I asked I was weak or incapable.
SO I asked. One said they couldn’t help and the other down right ignored my request. I cried. Then I laughed. I laughed and laughed and cried. It wasn’t so hard asking. I didn’t die from being ignored. I didn’t die from surgery, from the car accident, no business.Yeah, I decided WE GOT THIS! The Universe and I.
I understood that the job, the man, the money were an ILLUSION. And I knew that I was the CREATRIX of my life.
No shame in becoming more stable before launching something…yet I was told,
” This is YOUR initiation process. If you are to guide others, you must jump from the cliff without much physical support.”
SO divine timing exists. Often we want, we want and it does not happen. Other times we are left practically naked from all semblance of what human beings decree as “comfort and stability” and we are asked to FLY.
SO don’t wait for everything to be PERFECT. I know people who charged and borrowed and saved their money….their businesses didn’t succeed no matter how many photoshoots and websites they created. It’s not about what you HAVE to support you on the outside, it’s about what you HAVE on the inside.
YOU, ME, WE co-create our realities.
SO no money and no honey as they say, I flew.
It was scary, The weather didn’t seem right. I had to go through darkness, rain and storms. I created. I believed. I dreamt up programs, offerings and services…
Year and a half later. I am here. I am thriving. My clients are thriving. My students are expanding in their awareness and calling. I’ve traveled, taught, loved and been supported by dear friends, family and clients/students.
I give thanks EVERY DAY that the Universe saw fit to EMPLOY me whole.
Yes, you read right. I could’ve emerged from the car in a wheelchair or with many tubes. I crawled through the glass then walked out.
The Universe gives us ALL so much that we overlook. We have such a sense of entitlement and don’t SEE or give thanks for ALL we have!
It’s not perfect. It’s perfectly imperfect.
Be PRESENT. Be BRAVE.
Face your fears and watch them crumble into teachers.
Love yourself into BEING. LOve yourself into DOING.
Let your CALLING flow THROUGH YOU.
Start to HEAL now. INVOKE your Sacred ability to LOVE, HEAL & SHARE love.
Not tomorrow. Not when you have enough or hired the millionth coach.
NOW. NOW. NOW.
ESPECIALLY if you are sensitive.
ESPECIALLY.
The world needs you MORE than you can ever know.
loving you
in passionate transformation & sacred community,
V
© Vanessa Codorniu 5/22/14 The Daily Oracle